1. Describe the moment when you knew you had to tap into your inner courage and make changes in your life.
I was on the E train in Manhattan, it was a warm day and I was carrying a bottle of champagne, mini-cupcakes, flowers, and 20 handouts. I was about to host my first in-person workshop. I was sweating like a prostitute in church, not because of the heat, but because I was so nervous. My coach had given me an ultimatum, either I hosted this workshop or he would stop coaching me. I chose to host the workshop even though I didn’t think I was ready to stand in front of anybody and sell them something.
2. Walk us through the pivotal moment when you decided to act courageously. What was going through your mind? How did you feel at that moment?
Hosting my workshop… I wanted it to be a false alarm– in my imagination, nobody was hurt. I knew I was spiraling out of control so I started using my favorite tool. EFT Tapping. When I was done I knew that this was going to be one of the most important before-and-after events of my life. I knew that that day I was letting go of the fear of being judged and rejected. I knew that even if only one person showed up, if I stood in that room and shared my message, magic would happen. I knew that conquering these fears would give me the confidence to grow my business. If I could do this, I could do anything.
3. What inspired or motivated you to take the courageous step you did? What were a few of the first steps you took? What major actions did you have to take?
When I found coaching I fell in love with it. I started seeing life as a big possibility, it empowered me to believe in my dreams and desires, even if they seemed crazy. And, I wanted that for everyone else– I wanted every woman to know that she could dream bigger, much bigger.
Although I had read so many books and done so many programs, the most important step I took to help me with my fears and self-doubt, was working with a coach. My coach helped me see and process things that were keeping me stuck. Things that I would've never seen unless I was guided in a safe and loving way.
I wanted to quit so many times, but my commitment to share this magic was always greater than everything else. I knew that my dream was to guide women and I chose to believe that fear would be my teacher. I decided I didn’t want to be fearless, I wanted to be courageous. I wanted to feel the fear, learn from it, and move forward.
4. Paint a picture of what your life was like before you encountered the challenge that called for you to summon your courage.
I had been hiding for so long, hoping that clients would magically appear at my doors. I was so afraid to share what I did—petrified to sell. I was broke and broken. Who was I to think I could offer value? How could I think I could guide other women?
5. Were there any doubts or fears you had to overcome before taking action? How did you manage them?
I needed to believe in myself. I needed to focus on my dream.
My biggest dream was to support women achieve their juicy dreams. And every time I felt I was drowning in self-doubt, I pulled my life savor! I had created a booklet with all the testimonials I had received so far, and that helped my confidence. I also used EFT Tapping daily to release all the emotions that were not serving me.
6. What were some of the challenges or obstacles you faced during your journey to overcome this particular challenge?
The main challenge I needed to overcome was believing what I offered was valuable. I knew I was a good coach– a great coach, my testimonials said so, but there was still something, a little voice telling me: “You don’t know enough, you need another certification”.
7. Tell us about a memorable anecdote or turning point in your courageous journey.
On that warm NYC day, I knew that they weren’t going to evacuate the building. Ready or not, I was going to show up and do the workshop. I got there, set up the mini-cupcakes, the flowers, and the champagne, and waited for the first person to arrive. Six people showed up. They asked questions, they did the exercises I had prepared for them, they shared, and they loved the workshop. On that day, I experienced the magic of sharing what you love with others. Not to mention the new one-on-one clients I got from the workshop.
8. What role models or sources of support helped you stay strong and resilient?
When my coach gave me the ultimatum, I was so mad. After my workshop, I understood that being a coach is not about being nice. It’s about holding the space for growth, and sometimes that means being tough.
9. How did this experience impact your life and your perception of courage?
So many times we hear people say that we need to be fearless. I believe that fear is our friend, not only does it protect us from danger, but it also teaches us so many valuable lessons. I believe that instead of working on being fearless, we would be much happier if we focused on being courageous. Courage gives us the freedom to feel, process, move forward, and celebrate.
10. What lessons or wisdom have you gained from this experience that you'd like to share with others?
Whatever it is that you want to do. Know that it’s possible, it might not be easy or simple, but it’s possible. Use the tools and techniques that you have, as I mentioned before I love, love EFT Tapping. And, please remember that you can always ask for support. Hiring a coach is the best investment you’ll make, just make sure you are guided by your intuition when doing so. Never join a program or hire a coach out of desperation. You have what it takes, you just need guidance, support, and celebration.
11. What unexpected or positive outcomes emerged from your courageous actions?
After that workshop, I started doing more workshops to sell my one-on-one program. And, I started hosting an in-person networking event, the Wealthy Sexy Rebel party. 50-60 fabulous NYC women attended this party regularly.
12. How do you define courage, and how has your definition evolved through your own experiences?
Courage is all about being guided by your heart. I didn’t want to host that workshop. My fears were so loud, but I chose to listen to my heart and follow my intuition. I didn’t want it to just be another workshop, so I offered champagne!
13. Is there a particular message or advice you'd like to convey to other women who may be facing similar challenges?
Choose to conquer your fears and do whatever your heart is telling you to do. You’ll never regret that.
14. In retrospect, do you have any regrets or things you would have done differently?
The only regret I have is that I didn’t start sooner. Hosting in-person workshops and events is the most magical experience.
15. How has this experience shaped your identity or sense of self?
I’m forever grateful to all the women who attended that first workshop. Standing in that room sharing my magic gave me the confidence to know that I do have what it takes. And that what I offer has value.
16. What would you say to someone who is hesitant or afraid to take a courageous step in their life.
I know you have a dream and you deserve to make that dream a reality. Making that dream a reality will be beautiful, but the journey to get there will be magnificent. Remember, you deserve magnificent.
Lorena is a mentor for non-business coaches who are ready to design & create a life and biz that turns them on.