Sophia Susan Antonysamy is a certified CBT Coach Practitioner, founder of Purple Mindset, and a passionate author, public speaker, and radio show host. As a devoted mom, wife, and dog mom, Sophia draws upon her unique blend of personal and professional experience to inform her work. Through coaching, writing, and speaking, Sophia empowers moms, youth, and families to cultivate resilience, self-awareness, and a growth mindset, unlocking their full potential.
Purple Mindset empowers moms, youth, and families to thrive through compassionate coaching, education, and support, fostering resilience, self-awareness, and growth.
https://thepurplemindset.com/
1. Describe the moment when you knew you had to tap into your inner courage and make changes in your life.
My life was a quest for external validation. I sought a job to prove my intelligence. After moving from India to Wisconsin, I juggled parenting two young children, navigating a new country, and being a good wife. Despite having a wonderful family, a stable marriage, and a successful part-time job at US Bank, where I was well-liked, I felt an unshakeable sense of emptiness. The turning point came when my seven-year-old son refused to continue martial arts, despite being good at it. He said, 'Mom, just because I'm good at it doesn't mean I like it.' His words struck a chord. I realized I was living someone else's dream, not mine. That's when I decided to quit my banking job and pursue my true passions: writing, mindset, and coaching certifications.
Walk us through the pivotal moment when you decided to act courageously. What was going through your mind? How did you feel at that moment?
When we first moved to Bothell, I met a woman while walking my dog. Our casual conversation turned into a meaningful discussion about the importance of mental health. She suggested that I conduct a workshop at North Creek High School. Something resonated deeply within me, and I felt an overwhelming desire to start my own company, Purple Mindset, to spread mental health tools and resources to moms, youth, and families. Although I had an unexplainable passion, I was unsure of the next steps. So, I sought guidance from a business coach friend at Toastmasters. She helped me connect with the right people, and I registered my company. Taking a leap of faith, I jumped into conducting workshops and seizing public speaking opportunities and also being a radio show host sharing mental health tools in a lighthearted way every Sunday in Tamil & English broadcasting in US, Canada,UK & India.
Each time I stepped onto the stage, I overcame self-doubt by taking a deep breath and focusing on my purpose. With every step, it became easier.
3. What inspired or motivated you to take the courageous step you did? What were a few of the first steps you took? What major actions did you have to take?
My vision of making mental health tools accessible and affordable to many was my driving force. To turn this vision into reality, I focused on taking small, incremental steps. I started by connecting with a friend from Toastmasters, who introduced me to an accountant. Following her guidance, I methodically checked off each task: setting up my business with the bank, securing business insurance, and preparing for my first workshop at North Creek High School. For the workshop, I collaborated with a photographer, a local bakery, and other small businesses to create signs and brochures. I also spread the word about my initiative by seeking help from friends, including one I met while walking my dog, and reaching out to the Indian community. As the workshop approached, I concentrated on the details: from preparing my presentation materials, including clothes and PowerPoint, to ensuring I had the necessary technology support.
4. Paint a picture of what your life was like before you encountered the challenge that called for you to summon your courage.
If I were to paint a picture of my life before my challenges, it would appear flawless from the outside. However, the reality was starkly different - I was silently suffocating from within. My challenges forced me to reexamine my priorities, question my choices, and redefine what success truly meant to me.
5. Were there any doubts or fears you had to overcome before taking action? How did you manage them?
My husband often admires my courage to take the leap and figure things out as I go. As a highly action-oriented person, I've found that taking bold steps helps alleviate the pain of feeling empty. In fact, my pain has been the catalyst for my actions – it's the driving force that propels me forward.
6. What were some of the challenges or obstacles you faced during your journey to overcome this particular challenge?
My journey of self-discovery has been a long and winding path. While I've faced external challenges, such as navigating a restricted visa status, the most significant hurdles have been internal – my own limiting beliefs and the burden of perfectionism. These struggles have propelled me to embark on inner work, delving into the realms of psychology and mindset.
7. Tell us about a memorable anecdote or turning point in your courageous journey.
When we moved here two years ago, I almost convinced myself that my passion was just a figment of my imagination. I became hesitant to share this aspect of myself with others. One day, at a church gathering, I met a family and introduced myself. In a barely audible voice, I mentioned that I was a life coach. A woman, who is now a dear friend, responded with enthusiasm, urging her husband to ask me about my work. Initially, I wondered if she was mocking me, but her genuine gratitude and warmth put me at ease. This encounter gave me the courage to proudly own my passion again. It also led to a chance meeting with a friend while walking my dog, which ultimately inspired me to start my own company. Looking back, I realize that God had a beautiful plan in store for me, even when I was on the brink of giving up.
8. What role models or sources of support helped you stay strong and resilient?
My greatest source of support has been the incredible moms I've met in both Wisconsin and North Carolina. They've not only helped me with childcare, but also offered emotional support, reminding me that I'm not alone in my struggles. Most importantly, they've helped me discover my own strengths, which I hadn't noticed before. These women are truly angels in disguise, and I'm forever grateful for their kindness, encouragement, and inspiration. They've become my role models, demonstrating the transformative power of kindness and compassion – a reminder that even small acts can change the world.
9. How did this experience impact your life and your perception of courage?
One of my most common thinking errors is exaggeration, which leads me to fear things out of proportion. I often catch myself surprised by my own exaggerated reactions. However, I've learned that courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the willingness to act in spite of it. Reading Dr. Brené Brown's books has deeply resonated with me, reinforcing the idea that bravery and fear can coexist. This newfound understanding has given me the strength to keep moving forward, even when fear tries to hold me back.
10. What lessons or wisdom have you gained from this experience that you'd like to share with others?
The wisdom I've gained from my experiences and journey is that your desires are not coincidental. They have been intentionally planted by God for a specific purpose. Have faith in this truth, and even when doubts creep in, lean on God for guidance and support. I'd also like to share another important lesson: don't believe everything your inner voice tells you. Often, it's just a reflection of past programming that we've unknowingly repeated and reinforced. Just because it feels true doesn't mean it is. Take a step back, reflect, and seek help to understand the accuracy of your thoughts. Then, you can reprogram them to be more helpful, aligning with your life's purpose – whether big or small, a purpose is still a purpose.
11. What unexpected or positive outcomes emerged from your courageous actions?
My courageous actions have yielded lifelong rewards. For instance, attending a mom's group in a new country with my newborn led to lasting friendships. Taking bold steps to explore different job opportunities helped me clarify what I didn't want, ultimately guiding me toward my true passions. Perhaps most profoundly, my courageous leap of faith into writing and coaching, and launching Purple Mindset, has had a ripple effect of benefits – not only for me, but also for my family and the community around me.
12. How do you define courage, and how has your definition evolved through your own experiences?
My previous understanding of courage was that it meant being fearless. However, through my experiences, I've learned a valuable lesson: courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the willingness to act despite it. I've come to realize that I can be afraid and still be brave.
13. Is there a particular message or advice you'd like to convey to other women who may be facing similar challenges?
I want to encourage women to lean into their authentic selves. Being kind is not a sign of weakness, and your true self is not weird – it's wonderful. Courageously walk your own path, because the world needs your unique perspective, gifts, and talents. By embracing your individuality, you'll not only liberate yourself but also inspire others to do the same.
14. In retrospect, do you have any regrets or things you would have done differently?
I'd be dishonest if I said I have no regrets. There are moments when I wish I had been courageous enough to defy my parents' expectations and move to the US before getting married, or discovered my passion for psychology sooner. However, as I reflect on those perceived missed opportunities and 'wrong' choices, I realize they've all contributed to the beautiful life and greater purpose I'm living today. In this sense, my regrets fade away, replaced by a deeper understanding and appreciation for the journey that has led me to where I am now.
15. How has this experience shaped your identity or sense of self?
I'm deeply grateful for my experiences and challenges because today I've come to accept myself more fully than ever before – embracing my strengths, quirks, weaknesses, and imperfections.
16. What would you say to someone who is hesitant or afraid to take a courageous step in their life?
To someone afraid to take a courageous step, I'd say: I understand, I hear you, and I see you. It's okay to fail, because when you try again, you'll fail better, and eventually, you'll reach success. Your journey, with all its twists and turns, will become a roadmap for others to follow.
So, take a leap of faith – the world needs your unique courage and resilience.
