🌟 Get ready to be inspired by one of the incredible authors in our upcoming book Being Brave, launching December 2024! In her story, The Comeback is Stronger than the Setback!, she reveals how resilience, determination, and hope helped her overcome life’s toughest challenges.
Her journey is a powerful reminder that even after the hardest setbacks, there's always a chance for a stronger comeback. Stay tuned for more courageous stories!
Hello, my name is Kristina, and I am truly honored to be a part of this remarkable book. With over 20 years of experience in the healthcare industry, I have encountered my fair share of health scares. Through these experiences, I have come to understand that tomorrow is never guaranteed and each day is a precious gift. My aspiration is that the stories shared in this book will provide individuals facing challenges with a sense of hope and inspiration. Throughout my personal journey, I have gained valuable insights about myself, and I am grateful for the obstacles life has presented. While we may not have control of what happens to us, we do have the power to determine how these experiences shape us.
Thank you to our Courage Ignitor Sponsors, Michelle, and Mike Millman for empowering women to share their Brave Stories and inspiring a ripple of courage!
Describe the moment when you knew you had to tap into your inner courage and make changes in your life.
There were a couple of big moments when I knew I had to dig deep to find my inner courage. The first was in August 2015, when I went in for reconstructive knee surgery and ended up with a permanent femoral nerve palsy, which left me with little to no function in my left leg. I endured several additional surgeries, including an attempt at a femoral nerve graft, which unfortunately did not take. The second moment was September 2023, when I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I ended up getting a double mastectomy, and then one of my genetic tests came back positive for Lynch Syndrome, which puts me at a greater risk for ovarian, uterine, and colon cancer. I had a total hysterectomy in February 2024.
Walk us through the pivotal moment when you decided to act courageously. What was going through your mind? How did you feel at that moment?
I was at the lowest point in my life after my leg injury when I was watching the nightly news and saw a story of a woman who had bilateral leg braces and was hiking the Appalachian Trail. She is paralyzed from the waist down. I thought to myself, “I have to talk to her.” I sent her a private message on Facebook and shared my story. She then gave me the name of a brace company, and so I reached out to them and told them my story. A representative from the company contacted me within a few days.
What inspired or motivated you to take the courageous step you did? What were a few of the first steps you took? What major actions did you have to take?
I wanted to live the best life possible and be more mobile and active. Before my leg injury, I was extremely active in sports. After the leg injury, I was not able to enjoy the life that I had grown to love. I did a couple of trials with the brace company and was a candidate for the brace. It was a long, extensive process as the brace was very expensive, and insurance companies often denied the claims; however, once the brace was finalized, the company ran it through my insurance. My claim was covered upon the initial request — the first time the company had ever had this happen.Paint a picture of what your life was like before you encountered the challenge that called for you to summon your courage.
As I mentioned, I was extremely active in sports and fitness. I had a great job; however, after my leg injury, I was not able to do most of those things, so I gained a lot of weight. The job that I was at for over ten years ended. My employer told me that there were no available jobs to accommodate my disability, so I was forced to resign. I had to start my career over again. It was very difficult for me, and I became depressed and felt discouraged.
Were there any doubts or fears you had to overcome before taking action? How did you manage them?
I doubted everything about myself. I thought, Who will want me now that I’ve been left disabled? I feared not ever being “normal” again or being able to be active again. To this day, it’s a challenge to manage those fears; however, since receiving my brace in December 2022, I started walking in 5K races every month until my breast cancer diagnosis in September 2023. At each race, I would challenge myself to beat my previous time.
What were some of the challenges or obstacles you faced during your journey to overcome this particular challenge?
The biggest challenge is when people judge me. People do look at others differently when they have a physical disability. I’d like to point out that my disability does not define who I am. I also face challenges of people saying, “You can’t do that”; those words just push me harder and called for me to prove them wrong. With regards to the double mastectomy, I think that I’m damaged goods; however, I also tell myself that if someone doesn’t want to be with me, be my friend, or judge me based on my disabilities, then they don’t deserve to be in my life. The weight gain was also a big hurdle. I made the decision to get the gastric sleeve two and a half years ago and have lost 140 pounds and kept it off.
Tell us about a memorable anecdote or turning point in your courageous journey.
I have an amazing circle of friends, my mother and my sister, who have been there throughout my journeys. Without them, I wouldn’t be where I am today. I also rely on music and positive quotes to get through each day. Every day since my breast cancer diagnosis, I have listened to two songs — “Unstoppable” and “Angel By The Wings,” both by Sia. The words of those songs give me the strength to keep pushing forward, even if the steps are small.
What role models or sources of support helped you stay strong and resilient?
With regards to the leg injury, when I transferred my care to another facility, there was a doctor who was probably the key role model for me to accept what had happened. In all the years he had been in practice, he told me that he’d never seen an injury like mine. He gave me hope by saying we would get through it together. He was extremely kind, compassionate, and understanding during some of my worst moments in life.
I would also like to mention that the surgeon who did the initial surgery ended up coming to work at my current job. At first, this was devastating as I was still in the process of forgiving and accepting the outcome. I never thought that our paths would have ever crossed again; however, I am beyond grateful that it has. He has been one of my biggest supporters since my breast cancer diagnosis. I’ve also met some incredible women who are also survivors. In particular, my friend Michelle and I had the same general surgeon for our breast cancer surgeries, and she has been there for me from the beginning. She has been my rock, and I am beyond blessed for her support and friendship.
How did this experience impact your life and your perception of courage?
I would say both experiences have impacted my life greatly. My life changed in ways that I was not prepared for. My career changed, and I had to start over. I lost the ability to do a lot of the activities The Comeback Is Stronger than the Setback 25 that I had been able to do previously, but through it all, I am beyond thankful for my journeys and what I have had to endure and overcome. Looking back from the beginning, there were times when I didn’t think it would be possible to get through the “mess”; however, I continued and still continue to make each day count and put one foot in front of the other.
One of the most courageous things I did recently was speak directly to the surgeon who did the initial surgery. I didn’t want that burden any longer, and the first words out of my mouth to him were, “Thank you.” He looked at me and said, “We should be thanking you,” and he began to cry. He told me that he changed the way he did a lot of things due to the outcome of my surgery. I went on to tell him that I needed him to know that I was okay and that I was truly thankful for my journey. I think he needed to hear those words more than I needed to say them.
What lessons or wisdom have you gained from this experience that you’d like to share with others?
I’ve learned to take things one day at a time. Enjoy today and worry about tomorrow when it comes. Keep moving forward even if your steps are small. It doesn’t matter how slow you go as long as one doesn’t stop. Ask for help; this was an area that has been and is still difficult for me. I get so much joy in helping others, but I find it difficult to ask. My friend Michelle told me, “Kristina, you and I are so much alike in that we get joy from helping others. So why not let others feel that same joy by helping you?” I’ve learned to love myself just as I am. I do not see myself as disabled; rather, I focus on my abilities. I’ve turned my “mess” into a message.
What unexpected or positive outcomes emerged from your courageous actions?
With regards to the brace, I am now able to ambulate without using my cane and have been able to become more active. As I mentioned earlier, prior to my breast cancer diagnosis, I had been doing a 5K each month. The brace company has also made me a patient champion, which allows me to spread the word about the brace and travel to different states when there’s a potential patient who could benefit from the brace. The sheer joy I get by seeing the look on their faces when I tell my story and show them how the brace has changed my life for the better makes all the pain and angst of my journey worth it.
How do you define courage, and how has your definition evolved through your own experiences?
Courage is about facing your fears, pain, or challenges. Courage is being scared of something but doing it anyway. Courage is taking control of your life instead of letting other people or circumstances control you. I remember the moment that I was told my leg injury was permanent; it was one of the scariest things I had heard up to that point in my life. I remember thinking, “My life is over. What am I going to do?”
Shortly thereafter, I wanted to know what I could do to change my circumstances for the better. I then became my own advocate and did the research about the brace. It truly paid off, as it has been a game changer. With regards to hearing, “You have breast cancer,” I again let that soak in as best as I could, then started making a plan of how I was going to tackle this obstacle and come out on top.
Is there a particular message or advice you’d like to convey to other women who may be facing similar challenges?
Never give up. Be your own advocate. Reach out to others who have had similar challenges. Embrace your challenges. Be thankful for your challenges. Keep moving forward, even if it’s only small steps.
In retrospect, do you have any regrets or things you would have done differently?
At the beginning of my leg journey, I had a lot of anger as to how/why this could happen. In hindsight, I wish I had embraced those feelings instead of pretending everything was okay. I now realize that our journeys and challenges in life are meant to teach us something. I wish I had understood this sooner. However, those angry feelings were also part of the journey and have helped me believe that it’s okay to have those feelings; just don’t let them overcome you.
How has this experience shaped your identity or sense of self?
My sense of self was shaken to the core through both my leg journey and breast cancer journey. Yet, I have learned to embrace my new self and found that I am much stronger than I would have ever imagined. I know my journeys have a purpose, but more importantly, my life has a purpose. If I can inspire, help, and encourage even just one person, then my journeys are more than worth it.
What would you say to someone who is hesitant or afraid to take a courageous step in their life?
Hesitancy and fear are normal feelings when going through challenges; however, embrace those feelings and build on them. It’s not been an easy road, but I’ve learned to embrace the bumpy road and am thankful for every bump I’ve had to endure. In the words of Zig Ziglar “Difficult roads often lead to beautiful destinations. The best is yet to come.”